Calling the Kuchu

I have been meaning to write this since 2012. I have had so many versions hereof and I have discarded so many of them. I just never thought I would be able to articulate my experiences the way that I ought to. The funny thing is that whenever I tell people my story they are always fascinated and always want to hear more. So today is the day that I tell my story of being a gay traveller in Africa.

I think this is a perfect time to write this. The moment one says gay and Africa in the same sentence the first thing that comes to mind is death and all associated emotions. Admit it! I did too. My first thought was how I would have to act in order to be accepted. Being born and bred in South Africa I got accustomed to being myself and pay little attention to how my sexuality came across to people.

One particular moment that stands out was my trip from Nairobi, Kenya to Kampala, Uganda. I had always wanted to go to Kampala but I was, of course, scared to go there. I had planned my entire East African trip and left a few days opened for Kampala but didn’t book any flights and accommodation, just in case I changed my mind. The excitement of being in Mombasa and Nairobi and meeting kuchus (slang for gays) gave me the strength to go forth and book my flight to Kampala the next few days before heading to Tanzania.

I had a few problems (in my mind, of course). All of my clothes were quite ‘gay’. Just to paint a picture – I had this old man give me the eye of disapproval on my way to catch a matatu on Moi Avenue in Mombasa because my luminous orange short shorts probably hurt his eyes. I then decided that I needed to get clothes that made me look more (this word is debatable) butch *chuckle*. Off I went to the shops in Westgate, Nairobi! I managed to find some baggy pants and a blazer to wear to the airport so I can at least get my Visa. Now that I think of it, it was rather a dumb idea to think that clothes would make me look butch. But hey…

The morning of my trip came. I had mixed emotions! I was sweating up a storm. The clothes were too big and I was nervous. But I was excited to finally go and see Kampala and Makerere University, which for me should be the Havard of Africa. I sat next to a very unfriendly man that didn’t greet me back after I used my best KiSwahili to say hi to him. The fun began in Entebbe Airport, Uganda, when I had to go get my visa. I had my $50 in hand, my passport a big smile and a butch walk to match. Perhaps I should have left the smile behind. I greeted the lady at the desk in KiSwahili, I should have learnt some Buganda, and she was really nice and complemented my good KiSwahili. We chatted a bit about me being from Sauzi (South Africa) and I became quite comfortable. I completely forgot that I was meant to be straight acting. I picked my bags up and off I sashayed to get a taxi.

On the way to Entebbe I found myself disappointed at myself. Disappointed to have listened to the negative media about Africa. Western media! I actually cried! The drive from Entebbe was the most beautiful drive ever and I would not have experienced it had I not taken that step to not be afraid. I didn’t care what would happen to me when I get to Kampala. I was happy to have taken the bold step to see my continent. The sight of Victoria Lake took me back to my childhood when we learnt about the greatest lakes in Africa. And at that point I decided that I was going to write this to you and tell you to be brave and take that bold step in going to see the beautiful Africa.

My experiences in Africa have been nothing short of amazing. I have made friends that have become family. I have learnt to get out of my comfort zone – learnt a new language, gate crashed a wedding, took a boda boda (motorbike) that had no lights in the middle of the night from a club without a helmet, taken a matatu (local taxi) to Watumu from Mombasa without a map but the help of locals, stopped at a bar that looked busy and had a few beers, the list is endless. Not once have I felt discriminated. I understand that my experience may not be the same as everyone else’s.  

Bill Bryson summed it all up and said “to my mind, the greatest reward and luxury of travel is to be able to experience everyday things as if for the first time, to be in a position in which almost nothing is so familiar it is taken for granted.”  I look forward to sharing more of my travels in Africa with you.

By Mel M

Mel M is a young gay man with itchy feet and wanderlust tendencies. During most days he is an accountant and by night and other days he transforms into a travel addict that spends most of the time looking up destinations and being in those. His love for the African continent has had him travel to 12 African countries in two years and hasn't stopped. His travels aren't only limited to the African continent.